How to Handle collecting RSVPs

And other important things that are determined by your RSVPs and guest count!

Whether you've been planning your wedding for 6 months, a year, or even 18 months, collecting those RSVPs is inevitable and necessary. We've broken down this task into 3 follow-up dates and highlighted a few other important dates your vendors will need.

What we'll cover:

1. Deadlines to give yourself based on the deadlines given to you by your vendors.

2. How to handle guests who haven’t RSVPed yet.

3. What to do once you get your final guest count number.

What to make your RSVP date?

Your caterer plays a crucial role in setting this super important date! Most caterers will need a head/guest count and meal selections about 2 to 4 weeks in advance. So, before you print those invitations, make sure to double-check that vital date with them! For this exercise, we're using the 30-day mark for key dates.

The SBD team suggests adding 7-10 days to that date and marking it as your RSVP-by date, which means 37-40 days before your wedding. This gives you the perfect opportunity to follow up with any guests who haven't RSVPed or need to clarify their dietary restrictions. Let's get those responses in!

Why would someone forget to RSVP?

Life gets crazy! You sent out those save the dates six months before your big day, but they probably didn't include any action-items for your guests. That save the date might have made it onto your invitee's calendar—or it might have gotten lost among all the other papers and festive fridge magnets. Sometimes guests enthusiastically tell you they’re coming but forget to go online and RSVP, thinking you’ll just know, or they get caught up in the excitement of finding the perfect outfit. Trust us, there are countless reasons a guest might forget to RSVP!

And the more guests you have, the more you’ll get to connect with to ensure they’re all set for your celebration!

What relies on your RSVP date and guest count?

Now take a deep breath.

Did you?

Because a lot of things rely on your final guest list and head count:

• Your final catering bill

• The final layout and number of guest tables

• The number of centerpieces

• Linen quantities

• Final dessert bill

• The number of favors you have to make or buy

• The transportation schedule and number of buses

• Final seating assignments

• Your escort/place cards and/or seating chart

Follow up Dates

Get pumped and ready to reach out to your guest who hasn't RSVPed! Whether you prefer texting, emailing, messaging, or calling, choose the method that suits you and your guest best. Remember, not every grandma is on Facebook, and not every cousin checks their text messages! So, pick what works for both of you. You might even want to divide and conquer or delegate some outreach to ensure that guest is tracked down!

Besides your RSVP date, there are 3 times you'll want to follow up with those unknown guests.

7 days before your RSVP date

1 day before your RSVP date

7 days after your RSVP date

7 days before your RSVP date

One week before your RSVP date, send a short and informative message like:

Hi [name] Our wedding RSVP date is coming up and we haven't received your RSVP. Please submit it by [date] on our website [link]. Hope you can come!

1 day before your RSVP date

Now you'll need to be a little firmer and tell them that if they don't respond by a certain date, that they'll be considered a "no" and unable to attend:

Hi again! Our RSVP date is tomorrow and we're checking to make sure everyone has gotten their RSVPs in! Unfortunately we haven't received a response from you. Are you going to be able to come? We'd love to see you there but if we haven't heard anything by [date], we'll assume you're unable to attend!

7 days after your RSVP date

Just to make sure all of your bases are covered, it's time to tell them they are going to be marked as a "no" and unable to attend. We know, it's not the most "wedding joy" thing to do but it's needed! Remember, your money and your peace of mind depend on it!

Of course, you could also use this response for anyone that says they can't attend!

We're so sorry that you won't be able to attend our celebration! Let's catch up soon after the wedding. We'll miss you and wish you could be there!

I've gotten RSVPs and the deadline has came and went - what's next?

Get excited, because we're diving into the next steps that follow once those RSVPs roll in! We've got a favorite order of operations to tackle these tasks.

First up, remember that your hotel block(s) will likely close 30 days before your wedding. Once they do, grab those room lists from the hotel(s)! You'll need them to finalize those fabulous welcome bags and to perfect your transportation schedule.

When your catering deadline arrives, it's time to share those numbers, meal selections, allergies, and meal requirements with your caterer and/or dessert providers. This means they can finalize your bill, and you're one step closer to the big day!

Now you're 2.5 weeks out!

Once you've gathered those room block lists, it's time to contact your transportation company to lock in the pre-ceremony and post-reception schedules! Aim to have this set at least 2 weeks before your wedding. This way, you can proudly display it on your website the week before the big day and send it out to all your guests, ensuring they have everything they need before they travel. It’ll help them wrap up their plans and save you from a flood of questions on the day. And don't forget – appoint someone as the go-to person for shuttle and parking inquiries because you'll have your hands full with all the excitement!

If you've been eagerly sketching out seating assignments as RSVPs roll in, now's the perfect moment to finalize them! It might take a few days, but it'll be worth it. Soon, you'll be ready to order your fabulous seating chart (don't forget to list it by last name!) and those stylish place/escort cards. Plus, it's the ideal time to ensure every table is dressed to impress with beautiful linens—because at SBD, we absolutely love linens!

It's Single Digits Away!

Once you've reached the exciting 9 or 10 day mark, you might notice a few RSVPs have dropped! Don't wait—email your caterer right away! There's still a chance to make those last-minute adjustments!

Absolutely, make sure to update your layout and guest list with every single guest drop! If possible, try to avoid rearranging other guests or moving them to different tables, as this would mean reprinting the seating chart and the escort/place cards. We're all about shrinking that to-do list right now, not adding more to it!

When you only have 3 days left, make sure to provide your caterer and coordinator/planner with your updated guest list. They will need it to finalize the seating arrangements and prepare their catering summary for the event. Exciting times are near!

Have any last-minute changes? Don't worry! Just send a text to your coordinator/planner if anything arises, and they'll take care of any necessary adjustments on the big day. Let's make it incredible!

We hope this helped you tackle those pesky RSVPs and the important projects and to-dos that rely on your guest count!

For help on planning your seating assignments - check out the SBD blog below!

And remember....

Blog icon photo by the epic Melkay Photography.